I should be so happy right this minute, I used my whole day for others. First I made them all ice cream, then I watched them eat my ice cream, then I cleaned it all up, and then I brought home what was left just so others would not over indulge – Yes, very selfless. After all that you might say along with Homer, “Why are you so dreary, Grayquill?”
Do you think it could be your fault, Homer? DO YOU THINK? Why did you have to eat 5 bowls of ice cream? This is my body you are affecting – did you forget that?”
Loud sigh. . . “It was home-MADE ice cream!! That's what it's for - eating. Besides, the bowls were so small.”
“Oh, as compared to what… large cooking bowls? Homer my stomach hurts and I am pretty sure my pancreas is working double time trying to balance everything out from your idiocy. “
“Well, I am pretty sure you are exaggerating. I don’t know what you’re so mad about – you made the ice cream, I only ate it.”
“Well, did you think just maybe someone else might have wanted a taste?”
Gee-whiz Grayquill, you better calm down before you have a coronary from all that heavy cream you consumed. Did you forget those six other people who also ate your precious ice cream? Some of them had seconds. Why, was I not allowed seconds?”
“Tap you helmet, it is the fourth and fifth were talking about here.”
“Oh… D’OH! Grayquill’s always picking on me.”
Well who’s to say who ate the ice cream? Maybe the real question is, was that self talk or just an imaginary friend?
You could be the judgmental type, and say some smart-alecky comment about how the ice cream is not the real problem; what we need here is a shrink. And, I would say to that – if you are just now figuring that out maybe you need the shrink. Personally, another bowl of ice cream sounds pretty gosh darn good about now.
You could be the type that says, “Can I have the receipt?” And, I would say in my grumpy mood. Stop being so lazy and go look it up, it’s on page 202 of Betty Crocker.
Maybe you’re the type that says, I don’t see what’s so weird about that – I have several imaginary friends myself. And of course my response to that would be – this was not real, go call a shrink. Then come on over and we will finish off the ice cream.